Mad Libs Monday – “How to Enjoy Yourself on the Beach”
When you go to the beach, you must take along a big blanket, a thermos bottle full of piss, lots of suntan fags, and a couple of folding sybians. Then you put on your condoms so you can get a beautiful diareah-brown to last you all summer.
You also should have a big hat to keep the sun off your horse cock. If you want exercise, you can find some shits to play volleyball with. Volleyball is America’s favorite hairless game.
You can also bring a shitty lunch, such as hard-boiled dongs, a few penis fish sandwiches with mustard, and some bottles of knuckle-cunt cola.
If you remember all of the above and get a place near a dope-ass lifeguard, you can sunbathe swimingly all day.